The Personals (1982) Dating in the early ‘80s as filtered through the regional lens of Minneapolis

Theme Song: There are a total of five Nicolette Larson songs used throughout The Personals, including “Lotta Love,” “You Send Me,” “Isn’t It Always Love,” “Give A Little,” and “Fallen.”

Interesting Dated References: Literally every possible reference you could make when dealing with yuppies and the dating scene of the early ‘80s — Racquetball, jogging, roller skating, quaaludes, answering machines, personal ads, psychoanalysis, therapists. It goes on and on with little to no expounding.

Best Line: Maybe not the best, but the most confounding, which is said to a woman who was worried about her husband abusing her when she gets home — “You’re not going to be walking into any airbourne ashtrays when you get home, are you?”

Social Context: This is a movie about dating in the early ‘80s as filtered through the regional lens of Minneapolis, Minnesota. It’s a theatre-troupe re-imagining of Annie Hall without the culture of New York; homogenized to be as inoffensive as possible.

Summary: Newly-divorced Bill decides to tackle the local dating scene via the personal ads. Bill is a fucking nerd whose only passions appear to be wearing striped polo shirts and a desire to learn how to roller skate.

After one unsuccessful date, he immediately falls in love with his second prospect, Adrienne (Karen Landry from Patti Rocks), only to find out she is married.

They have endless conversations entailing psychobabble-nonsense on feelings and emotions, stacked on top of ridiculous roller skating montages around Lake of the Isles in Minnesota.

Remember when everyone was just cool with the fact we all have nipples and women were free to not wear bras and men were respectful, or whatever? Neither do I, but apparently that’s how things were in the ‘70s and ‘80s and it seems like an okay time to be alive and maybe people were more well-adjusted then instead of giant shit-heap piles of dissatisfied, sexualized garbage stewing in chronic spite. Anyway, Adrienne and Bill agree to go their separate ways. Bill, now really good at roller skating, starts stalking women in the park in a futile effort to pair up and procreate.

Look, it’s sweet, it’s regional, there’s some charm, but overall it’s a bit full of itself. Comedy-wise, the actors have a good rapport, but when it comes to the stifled, psychoanalytic meanderings, things start to sound like a community college Intro to Psych course.

Worth Mentioning:
– Filmed entirely on location in Minneapolis.

– There’s a curious 20-minute interview with star, Bill Schoppert, on YouTube during a press junket for the film. Unfortunately the most interesting part is the awesome old-ass Miller Lite commercial preceding the footage.

– First feature for Peter Markle, director of Hot Dog… The Movie, Youngblood, and the hilarious Wagons East.

Poster and Box Art: The home video release looks as homogenized as the film: Guy leering on park bench, etc. Who cares.

Availability: Used VHS on eBay, maybe?